Using Genesis 2 for Wedding Sermons: Avoiding Questionable Interpretations - CBE International (2024)

As a minister serving in China, I have attended many church-organized public weddings over the years and have heard numerous wedding sermons. Genesis 2 is undoubtedly one of the most popular wedding sermon texts. The Chinese church (and often the global church) has developed some conventional applications for this chapter regarding love and marriage. However, some of these conventional applications are questionable; they may not fully align with the original intent of the writer of Genesis.

Here, I will illustrate four typical and well-known examples:

Overemphasizing the Necessity of Marriage with “It is not good for the man to be alone”

The phrase “it is not good for the man to be alone” (NIV) is often used to argue that marriage is a universal calling; it is almost treated as inevitable. But while this phrase relates to marriage, it does not conclusively argue for the necessity of marriage. In the creation narrative, “not good” means “incomplete”; the “complete” is found in community.^[1] Throughout Genesis 1, God evaluates everything he has created as “good,” but here in Genesis 2, he says something is “not good.” But what made God’s creation “good”?

“Good” primarily signifies the completion of God’s original design without defects. “Good” in Genesis 1 means “complete relationship”—separating land and sea, establishing order, and populating the sea, land, and sky with creatures.^[2] Similarly, “It is not good that the man should be alone” in Genesis 2:18 indicates that God’s plan from Genesis 1:26–27 was not yet complete. According to 1:26–27: “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness . . .. So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” It is only after God created both man and woman that God’s intention of creating mankind in God’s image was fulfilled. This completeness is similar to having more than one bird in the sky and more than one aquatic creature in the sea—the earth now has both man and woman. Hence, the focus of “it is not good that the man should be alone” is on the completeness of the species (needing both male and female), rather than emphasizing the necessity of marriage for every individual. It is not saying that a man or woman must have a spouse to be “good” or “complete.”

Misuse of the Term “Helper” when Referring to Wives

In the context of traditional Chinese culture (as elsewhere), we easily associate the concept of “helper” in Genesis 2:18 with the familiar image of a “virtuous wife,”^[3] meaning that a woman or wife should be an “internal assistant” to her husband. Unfortunately, many speakers and audiences influenced by traditional Confucian thought uncritically inject the Confucian notion of women’s subordination to men into their understanding of the term “helper” (just as many Western thinkers inject patriarchal Greco-Roman values into their understanding of the passage).^[4] But these thinkers make two fundamental mistakes.

First, they misinterpret “helper” as implying a dominant-subordinate relationship. In fact, whether in verb or noun form, the term in the Old Testament most often has God as “helper,” with a few instances of people helping others (e.g., Isaiah 41:6; Ezra 10:15). Moreover, in nearly all biblical examples, the “helper” is presented as the “stronger” party supporting the “weaker” one, rather than the lesser “assistant/helper” we might think of when we hear the word.^[5]

Second, the Hebrew original term in Genesis 2:18 includes a prepositional phrase that is often not translated in some Chinese versions.^[6] Though there are various interpretations of this compound word, scholars generally agree it conveys the idea of “corresponding to” or “matching.”^[7] In other words, woman is a “corresponding helper” to man. This notion of “corresponding” reflects a mutual and reciprocal relationship, completely overturning any hierarchical structure.^[8]

Therefore, saying a woman is a man’s helper does not imply any inequality in status or role; rather, it emphasizes the equal dependency and reciprocal relationship between men and women. They are helpers to each other.

Overextending the Significance of “Rib” in Anatomy

The symbolism behind Adam’s “rib” has also been overextended in many wedding sermons that I have heard. Common interpretations I’ve heard include the rib being closest to the heart (implying the wife is the husband’s dearest) and the rib being the most fragile bone (implying the husband must protect the wife), among other interesting interpretations. While some might find these interpretations appealing, they are deeply rooted in a hierarchical structure that insists on a “protector-dependent” relationship between the sexes. Men are seen as protectors and providers, while women are seen as needing to be protected and as the recipients of men’s provision. Women are often asked to cede authority to their husbands in return.^[9]

However, the Hebrew word translated as “rib” in the Old Testament usually refers not to a bodily structure but to the side of a building or house.^[10] While it can be inferred that the term, when applied to humans, describes something close to the rib area, the overall picture should not be a “single rib” but rather “a part from Adam’s side, including bones and flesh.”

In summary, while it is not problematic to find symbolic meaning in the rib’s significance, we should not use this word to shape a gender hierarchy, as it does not align with the Bible.

Misinterpreting “Bone of My Bones and Flesh of My Flesh” as Romantic Words

The final common error is interpreting “bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” as Adam’s romantic words to Eve. (I have heard this phrase called “the first love words of humanity.”) The expression is often combined with the “rib” to emphasize the man’s expression of protection and care for the woman.

Though this sounds romantic, it is inaccurate. “Bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” is a Hebrew idiom expressing kinship, similar to the Chinese cultural concept of “blood kin.”^[11] For instance, in Genesis 29:14, Laban calls Jacob “my own flesh and blood,” and in Judges 9:1–2, Abimelech refers to himself as “bone and flesh” to his maternal uncles and grandfather’s family. Therefore, “bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” are not romantic words but a metaphor for kinship: Adam is saying to Eve, “You are my kin (flesh and blood)!” Adam recognizes that Eve is like him in a way that the animals are not.

Conclusion

A public wedding ceremony is a momentous occasion for a newlywed couple, marking the start of their life together. For the couple and everyone involved—relatives, church members, and guests—the message delivered during the ceremony is often deeply memorable. Personally, I still remember the sermon from my own wedding and many others I’ve attended as a guest. As a pastor, I am always mindful of the importance of each wedding sermon, ensuring that I faithfully convey biblical values on gender and marriage. It is crucial to avoid unintentionally introducing non-biblical ideas into the interpretation of Scripture. One of my key responsibilities is to impart these values accurately, helping to shape the lives of every couple I have the privilege to marry.

[1] Claus Westermann, Genesis 1–11: A Continental Commentary, trans. John J. Scullion (Minneapolis: Augsburg Fortress, 1984), 227; Nijay K. Gupta, Tell Her Story: How Women Led, Taught, and Ministered in the Early Church (Downers Grove: IVP, 2023), 73–152.

[2] Terence E. Fretheim, God and World in the Old Testament: A Relational Theology of Creation (Nashville: Abingdon Press, 2010), 19.

[3] [Xián nèizhù] in Pinyin. For further reading, see Yanshuo Zhang, “A Comparative Study of the ‘Virtuous Wife’ in Traditional Chinese and Biblical Proverbs,” China-U.S. Journal of Humanities, issue 5 (October 2020). https://www.academia.edu/44702079/A_Comparative_Study_of_the_Virtuous_Wife_in_Traditional_Chinese_and_Biblical_Proverbs.

[4] See https://www.cbeinternational.org/resource/lets-stop-doing-as-the-romans-do/.

[5] For further reading, see https://margmowczko.com/ezer-kenegdo-subordinate-helper-eve/ and https://margmowczko.com/gender-hierarchy-creation-narrative-genesis-2/.

[6] Especially in the translations widely used by Chinese people: the Union Version Chinese Bible and the LYU JHEN JHONG Bible.

[7] John H. Walton, Genesis : The NIV Application Commentary (Grand Rapids, Mich: Zondervan, 2001), 176–177.

[8] For further reading, see https://www.cbeinternational.org/resource/genesis-equality-part-1/.

[9] Among others, Mary Edwards Walker makes several observations along these lines in Hit (New York: The American News Company, 1871).

[10] For example: Exodus 26:20 [26, 27, 35], 1 Kings 6:5 [8, 15, 16], and Ezekiel 41:5 [6, 7, 8, 9, 11, 26].

[11] [Gǔ Ròu zhī qīn] in Pinyin.

Related Resources

Popular Articles